+ There will be no marriage in heavenly eternity.
+ The purposes of marriage are to be accomplished here on earth in preparation for eternity.
+ God puts physical circumstances in my life to teach me spiritual lessons.
How much these concepts have helped to change my attitude towards my marriage and towards my help (wife). (For those reading who aren't married, please keep reading, many of these ideas go towards all relationships).
I've spoken to more than one husband recently who has said something like "whenever my wife gets on the subject of (insert painful subject here), I just sort-of tune her out." As we discuss further the husband will indignantly tell me that his wife will start yelling at him and maybe use foul language at him. "That's not very Christian of her, is it?" "As her spiritual leader, I'm not going to tolerate that!" "That's not being the quiet, submissive wife that SCRIPTURE calls her to be!"
The rest of the conversation might go something like this:
K(im): In general, why do you think people yell?
H(usband): Because they're mad!
K: Sometimes, yes. Why else might someone yell or shout?
H: Because the other person can't hear them?
K: Right. Or maybe won't hear them?
H: Ohhhh, you mean like when I said I tune her out when she talks about (insert painful subject here)?
K: Yes. Sometimes people have to yell just to get the other person's attention.
H: Oh, I can hear her, believe me.
K: Okay, but are you paying attention? What do you think God is trying to teach you in this situation? His Word says "All things work together for good..." This is one of those "All things." What's He saying to you?
H: Well...that I need to be a better listener?
K: Right. We need to be open to the possibility that God is trying to speak to us through our wives. Maybe even demanding a response to a painful situation. Giving us an opportunity to respond in a Christlike way...to grow...
H: I never thought of it that way...
"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." CS Lewis-The Problem of Pain
Until next time...Blessings, Kim