Thursday, February 19, 2009

P4E.099 Disconnected Redux: Familiarity Breeds Contempt

Over the next three posts, I'll try to pull 3 different ideas together in relation to being disconnected.

The first idea is that "Familiarity Breeds Contempt."
The second is "The Difference Between Men and Women That Really Matters."
The third is "What 'The Flesh' Looks Like and What to Do About It."

There's a saying that goes "Familiarity Breeds Contempt."

In the case of relationships, the word "contempt" could be replaced with "presumption." What I mean is, we take for granted that with which we are familiar. Taking relationships (especially marriage) for granted can put a husband in a very bad way. When I'm in a bad way, I liken myself to water in several ways:

- I "run downhill" and settle in a low spot.
- I seek a level, stationary state and if I find one, I'll stay there until I stagnate or evaporate.
- Like water, I can be "inert," that is, I can have a limited ability to react and I can be slow and apathetic.

What this translates to is that when I think everything's OK, it's not. I presume that as long as things aren't blowing up, I'm OK. But, the fact is that, if I am not consciously making every effort to improve and move forward in my spirit and relationships, I'm falling backwards.

It's easy for me to disconnect spiritually because I don't value my spiritual nature enough to pay it much attention. Another way of saying "familiarity breeds contempt" is that when I think I've got my relationship with my wife figured out, when I take it for granted, I naturally devalue it. This is one reason why Scripture says, "Consider it all joy when you encounter various trials..." The trials are put there by God so that I won't just float along thinking everything's OK.

Gwen says that many times people get hurt around horses because they let their guard down doing something they've done a million times. They've disconnected and become complacent enough to forget about the inherent danger in what they are doing...

Everybody say "Hmmmmm."

I've described something in this first part. In the next two parts I'll write more about what can be done about it and how to do it.

Peace, Kim

Next: The Difference Between Men and Women that Really Matters

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