In her recently released book, The Female Brain, Dr. Louann Brizendine says that her studies show that women talk almost three times as much as men. The average man says around 7,000 words in a day, while the average woman says 20,000 words. The female psychiatrist says that inherent differences between the male and female brain explain why women are naturally more talkative than men. Women's brains devote more brain cells to talking than their male counterparts. Testosterone pares back the areas responsible for communication, emotion and memory in the male brain. "Women have an eight-lane superhighway for processing emotion, while men have a small country road," says Dr. Brizendine. " I believe women actually perceive the world differently from men."
That said, I wonder if we men should check our attitudes right now. Did you just think something like "Only three times more?" or "No wonder they're so emotional?" or "I say quality is more important that quantity" or "This proves we'll never understand them!" Do you think like Professor Higgins in My Fair Lady: "Why can't a woman...be more like a man?" Would you characterize your own response to the information you just read as "Christlike?" Neither did I at first.
Let's go down another road. God is not a God of confusion. He would not give us a command that He believed we couldn't keep. He commands us husbands to live with our wives in an understanding way..so that our prayers won't be hindered (I Peter 3:7).
When God created man He said, "It is not good for man to be alone. I will make for him a help." He knew that the male nature to communicate, emote or remember would be limited so He created a being with a heightened capacity to communicate, emote and remember to "help" us. WHY? Because He values communication, emotions and a good memory!
According to Dr. Brizendine's study, we men start off at a disadvantage in these areas. Shall we point to this disadvantage and blame it as the reason that we struggle in communicating, feeling and remembering? Or shall we use it as motivation to overcome the disadvantage and better ourselves?
Let me point out one thing before you answer. Jesus told Nicodemus that unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God. He also said that what is born of the flesh is flesh and what is born of the Spirit is spirit. Communication, emotions and a good memory are relational, therefore spiritual, matters. The flesh may be disadvantaged, but when born again of the Spirit we overcome the disadvantages and become better. So maybe we don't better ourselves, but when we ask Him in, God in us makes us better. The corollary is that when God is in us our ability to communicate, our emotional lucidity and our memory should all be heightened. Pray for it.
Your ally in the pursuit of Christlikeness, Kim
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